Intro to my Research Paper on the Boxer Rebellion

As Father and I went to the cloth merchant’s house to sell our goods, I looked around the city. Much had changed since the foreigners had come to my homeland. More of our people were wearing the western style of clothing. Our cloth was not selling well when we went to the market. We were losing business now that the western clothes were selling cheaper. Many of the trades were passed down from father to son, just like my father did for me, these trades were becoming extinct. The westerners machine made cloth and pottery, just to name two, were selling a lot cheaper than our hand made products were. We pulled in front of Li Wu, the cloth merchant’s, house. I watched as Father and Li Wu talked. I could not hear what was said, but Father did not look happy as he climbed into the cart. “What is wrong Father?” I asked, “Why did you not sell our cloth to the honorable Li Wu?” Father replied, a tinge of annoyance creeping into his voice, “Because son, the westerner’s cloth is cheaper for the merchants like the honorable Li Wu to buy and sell. No one will buy our cloth.” We went to other merchants, but like Li Wu, they told us that the Westerner cloth was easier to buy. In the lean years to come, I learned to hate the foreigners for what they had done to my family. Our family and others of the trade were put into poverty from the Westerners machine made products. As my hatred grew, I heard about the cult called the Fists of Harmonious Righteousness or the Boxers. I joined the cult to extract my revenge for what these foreigners had done to my family.

Criticsms are greatly appreciated :)

The clash of swords echoed through the clearing. A bead of sweat rolled down my forehead. I had to end this NOW. I risked a dangerous maneuver; I stabbed at my opponent, then whirled in a tight circle, my long, glossy black hair fanning out behind me. I turned my head in order to spot my opponent. He had kneeled and had his sword in the ‘block’ position. I had to do something, and quickly. I had my answer in the bat of an eye. I pulled my sword in towards me, and used the momentum to catapult over my opponents head. I somersaulted when I hit the ground. I sprang up, whirled, and stabbed at my opponent. I missed by a hairsbreadth. I then angled my sword, and slashed my opponent from shoulder to hip. He keeled over, his chest a bloody mess. I bent down and checked his pulse. Nothing, he was dead. I straightened up and blew a strand of sweaty hair from my eyes. Third attack today, I thought as I moved toward the stream at the edge of the clearing to wash up. She must really want to re-capture me again. I pondered  the way the water droplets shined on my heavily scarred wrists.

One of my Ideas

Hello,

            My name is Gertrude Anna Ruby Yen, or as I like to be called, Gary. I am 20 years old, 5’8”, and have an athletic build. You have probably never heard of me, I have sent you the package you now hold in your hands. In the package is my diary with everything that has happened to me in the past three years. All of it is true. Do not take it lightly, and DON’T throw it out, it might get into the wrong hands. Please pardon all my misspellings and the blacked out words. And take everything I say with the utmost seriousness. What I went through, might happen to you some day.

                                                                                                      Gary